Thursday, August 02, 2007
Had A Dad. Been A Son. All Other Priorities Rescinded.
Being a good parent is hard. It involves sacrifice. It involves putting someone else first. It involves putting all of your own wishes, desires, and wants as secondary concerns.
A child is helpless, and innocent. It has no earning power. No career. A child is a money vampire. The more your children have, the less you have. It's often the case that parents are in penury. Have no money for themselves. Aside from food, nothing. No entertainments but the free things on television. And sex. Sex is free, but dangerous. Be careful.
Parents are often economically invisible. It's hard, and definitely unenjoyable. But also, as a parent one needs to understand that you suddenly aren't the Most Important People In The World. You have responsibility to someone else, and that responsibility is ultimately for that other persons complete and utter survival. It's not the responsibility of one parent, but that of both, to work together. Sometimes as a parent, you need to have a relationship with someone you don't want to. And sometimes nobody is right. Compromise is essential. It's difficult, but nobody ever said anything had to be easy.
The economics may not stack up. But if you spend any money on yourself and your childen go without, I feel that you are in some way neglecting your parental responsibilities. The only reason I spend money on myself is because I can, and if I couldn't, I wouldn't. Sometimes it feels like slavery, and that I work for about £2 an hour. The ultimate lesson to any adult is Your Children Are More Important Than You Are. It's a hard and ugly lesson to learn. But it's true. As is my religious belief that, from the gospel of Bill & Ted, is that we should "Be Excellent To Each Other".
I don't like taking sides, and can only offer my own opinions. Don't ask me to take sides.