(Planet Me)
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
 
The End Of The Year
Birmingham, December 2013

In the obligatory, end of year post, I bid adieu to 2013. No fond farewell, no goodbye, no regrets. 2013 was not really an annus horribilius, it started well, and ended much better, but compared to the largely risible 2012, 2013 was a staggering disappointment for the most part. Some dates were glorious, and others were utterly repugnant. I survived a serious period of illhealth, and fought off a tenancious black dog. I also defeated an unwanted – not to say arrogant and ignorant – hubristic foe, but at no small cost. I wasn't always the person I wanted to be, but I was the person I had to be. I had to endure situations I despised, and built a plan to improve my life – which I executed flawlessly, but it really was nerve-wracking and stressful. At the end of it, I have come out of 2013 in a healthy place, having had to be an unwilling participant in a personal war I have not mentioned here – for loose lips sink ships. I would have felt better to share with you every block and parry. But instead I quietly fought, and I came out of 2013 relieved of a number of great weights that have been dragging me down for some time. At last, I am born, and heading to a future.

Optimism is a curse, and has always been so, and yet, without it, everything is so much darker than it is. I found my sense of self-worth again this year, and decided I was worth more than the circumstances I had been living in. My friends, my children, my family have all been invaluable in helping me defeat the monsters that have threatened me. I have made great new friends this year, and other friendships have shown previously unknown strengths. I couldn't've done it without you, of whom there are too many to mention, and any list would just inadvertantly leave someone out.

So, 2013, I am glad to see the end of you. 2014 on the other hand, is looking great. I'm pleased to meet the new year.


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